Hi,
I'm wondering if I'm an odd ball out or if my fear is normal.
I'm 55, a grandma, and new to motorcycles. I had never been on one because my mother was petrified so as I was growing up I never was on one.
I took the MSF course (had to leave the second day for a family emergency) so I am taking it again in the near future.
I have a 1999 Honda VLX600 that I got a great deal from a friend and I absolutely love.
My problem is I seem to have too much fear. I'm not sure if I should hang it up and sell the bike but I REALLY don't want to. I want to ride. Ive watched every video on You TUbe I can find.
I have been riding near my house on a straight service road-no traffic.
I'm nervous about leaning too far or laying it down. I did ok on the Rebel in class and was told when I had to leave that I would do fine when I came back. So they had faith, LOL.
I'm wondering if it's because I'm older and starting? Has anyone else felt like this?
I think fear is natural. Im currently teaching my wife how to ride, and she is hesistant to countersteer when cornering, but is slowly getting the feel for it. I think if you start slow around familiar corners and slowly build speed as you get more comfortable your fear will subside. Completing the class will definitely help.
Last July, at the age of 44, I took the MSF course. I had never been on a motorcycle and was kind of afraid of riding them, but last spring I was bit hard by the bike bug and looked at it like something I needed to accomplish. After passing the MSF I purchased my Shadow 1100 Aero and now more that 6,000 miles later I feel more comfortable with riding. I really think the MSF course was a great learning tool.
I am 47 yrs old and I just started riding. The first time ever on a motorcycle was the first day of my MSF course on Apr. 30th of this year!
I took the course and rode their rebel 250's for the 2 days of the course. I then purchased a 2006 Honda Shadow 600VLX. I had such a fear starting out riding the bike the first week I was almost ready to give it up!
But, I was determined to do this! I rode the bike for 2 weeks around the culdesac's in my neighborhood until I felt comfortable enough to ride further.
A month and a half later, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE riding my bike!! It took me 3 times to pass the test to get my endorsement but I did it! (got my endorsement 2 weeks ago)
The MSF course will give you a lot more confidence than you realize. I took it about 3 weeks ago at 30 years old, had only been riding about 1 month before that (around the house like you speak of) and gained A LOT of confidence for slow speed maneuvers, which seems to be the hard part for a lot of people (including me). Then you've just got to get on the bike and use what you learn. More confidence will follow.
Fear keeps you alive, but it can also paralyze you. At 43 I started riding again, after 20 years away from it. The first time I went out in heavy traffic, I thought to myself "what am I doing?" It passes as you become more experienced, but keep enough of that fear to keep you alive.
The problem with fear is that it is insidious, and can put you on a slippery slope where it becomes difficult to know what is reasonable and what isn't.
I believe there's a difference between these two things; the endless mental chatter of your brain, imagining every negative possibility...and the quieter, gut feeling you get that usually comes in unexpectedly. I try to pay close attention to the latter and mostly ignore the former.
I've had the opportunity to engage in some relatively high-risk activities and the general approach, used by the people who routinely do those types of things, is to eliminate or reduce all of the risk that you have control over and then, when you have double-checked everything and all systems are go, put all of your focus on the moment.
It is very empowering and joyful to step through fear. Once done with something like riding, you may find yourself questioning whether fear has stopped you in other areas of life; career, relationships, whatever. @HoosierScooter, I do think that's a great way to start someone off. Much better to have the mechanics of riding committed to muscle memory and then bring in other factors. I started on dirt bikes as a kid and, while street riding is a somewhat different set of skills, I think that that experience has served me well.
Do the MSF course again then get a cheap 250 and ride it till you get confidence, then sell the 250 and ride the bigger bike. That's what I should have done but didn't. Whatever bike you ride, if you have much speed at all you would have to try really hard to make it fall over going around curves. Slow speed turning like from a stop is where some balance comes into play. From a stop at an intersection I've leaned it over so far that the pegs scrape without falling over. So it can lean over further than you think it can.
The best thing you can do to build confidence is learn clutch control and slow speed maneuvering. Going fast in a straight line is easy.
MSF on a 250 was my first experience last year. Then I had to ride a 650 which seemed massive and I thought this is not a good beginner bike, it's too big. But now with experience it seems small. The first thing I did before getting on the road with it is ride circles in the back yard because I figured it's a softer surface if I fall. Then I had enough confidence to ride the neighborhood. Lots of intersections so good practice turning right and left from a stop. Then progress to main roads outside the neighborhood. If you do a progression like that then you will build confidence and lose fear. The only thing I'm afraid of now is other traffic. Cagers are crazy sometimes. I've had two or three close calls but those are getting fewer as I gain experience.
Oh yeah, another piece of advice. wear full CE rated armor at least at first as a newb. That way if you do hit pavement you wont get all scraped up like I did the first time.
Hopefully that little description of my experience as a newbie will help you some.
All: I didn't mean "dirt bikin" in my suggestion. While ripping through the stripper pits is a blast, I'm guessing it's not the OP's cup of tea.
My wife learned on a Hodoka Road Toad 100cc enduro on flat open ground.
(Man, I wish I still had that thing. )
Small bike, rural setting, get comfortable, move up till you find a bike that FITS YOU and your needs. This is my advice to anyone btw, not just grandmas. :wink2:
Buying another bike my not be a financial viable option for the OP, I know it wouldn't be for me. I would suggest riding roads with less traffic, or practicing in empty parking lots while you get comfortable with the bike and cornering. I had a smaller 400 when I first got back into riding, the 750 has a different center of gravity, and it took me some time to get used to how it handled compared to the smaller bike. I wouldn't say the 600 is too big a bike, but I would guess it is a different bike from what she rode in the course.
And, I may have overgeneralized, as it's my tendency to generalize, condense, and apply to the specific situation.
I figured the OP could handle that last bit. :grin2:
Also, it's not required to actually own the starter/ learning bike, if a friend or a friend of a friend has something like that. I find bike people love to share.
A 600 could be fine, and a 250 way too big. A lot depends on the rider's size and experience, etc. I always figured if it's too big for you to pick up when it falls over, it's too big for you.
My dad may he RIP, used to say " The better part of common sense is a man's own fear." It keeps us from over reaching and testing our own mortality. Your fears come from the unknown which you learn about and overcome a bit at a time. Keep at it, take your time, and you'll do just fine.
My sister just recently learned to ride on a 250 Rebel as well. She now has a 650 Savage. The best thing I can advise is to find some one to ride with for a while. Some one that has been riding for a while. Plan an out of the way route to just ride easy. Have your friend follow to watch you. Then that person can then give you tips on what they see wrong. My sister was afraid to turn as well. She tended to focus directly in front of her and not where she was going. After reminding her a few times that she was going to go where she looked. She finally got used to looking where she wanted to go. I think that was her biggest fear. Now she rides my 1100 and loves it. I agree, some fear is good. Alot is not. If you ride in your comfort zone, eventually you will find you are getting better and better and will push your self a little more. Just my 02
Like all new things, the more you do it the more you'll love it. Don't be afraid to do it. Soon, you won't be worried about riding but will miss it when you don't. It's an all in thing though, if you hesitate you'll get hurt. You have to throw yourself in and let the cards fall where they may. With the course I'm sure you'll do fine. Just listen and enjoy yourself. We're not all spring chickens and we didn't all start riding young. I was almost 40 when I started.
I started riding again at 43 and had only about 6 months total riding experience before that. A lot of people recommend working on slow maneuvers and while that is good advice, I found that I tended to focus too much on that right off the bat. What helped me was straight up saddle time. We live in the country, so do a lot of highway riding out of necessity. I have found that my slow speed maneuvering has gotten a lot better just by developing muscle memory for my particular bike. Believe it or not, another thing that helped tremendously was watching the Long Way Down and Long Way Round documentaries during the off (winter) season. I can't explain it, but my confidence about riding in general soared after I watched those and I was like a new rider from the first time I threw my leg over this spring! Hey, if it helped me, it might help you too!
Fear of riding will disappear as you do more of it...
Them Videos what teach Riding Skills are the ones I might recommend Watching...
I might suggest NOT watching the ones of those Cutting or carving corners in the Canyons...
Slowly your fear will be gone whilst you ride on that service road you mention, Practice, practice, Practice...
Ride every chance you get,
D
Cincy, you probably are at an advantage by being mature and knowing not to be overconfident and foolish as we all were when very young (and sometime never outgrow or outlive it). Your fear is from discipline you encounter and use. I don't know if you do any particular thing that you will 'be all right', that's a wild guess. But your chances are 'probably' good. And fear will always be with you and everyone else, heck, I have been riding longer than you have been alive and I still have fear along with confidence and want very dearly to keep riding. After all, riding a motorcycle IS a high risk no matter how you look at it. It's the desire that drives most of us. May you have success in your desires, safety on your side, and a lot of luck.
Thank you everyone for all the encouragement. I wanted to make sure I was salvageable, LOL. Being older I do have more fear than I did when I was younger. I'm going to keep trying. I don't have the money to buy a 250 now and I'm not in a rural area so those can't work.
My son is working in Aspen now so I'm hoping when he gets home for a couple days he can watch me. I hate to go over by myself, but I may have to.
That's probably a good thing. You don't heal as fast and get hurt easier when you get older. I'm almost 72 and still riding but with more fear than ever. I don't take the chances I did when I was young and probably stupid too. I don't ride at night because my eyes are not as good and there are more deer than ever. You just adapt to the limits your comfortable with.
Fear will cause you to be more careful, but don't let it cause you to stop riding. I'll ride until I can't hold it up.
I started at 56 and my wife at 58 years old. She started on a Vespa LX 150 scooter. What a nice scooter. She actually did her MSF course on the scooter. She was able to use her own scooter for the class but as she had no permit, I rode it there for her and she drove. At the end of the day I took the car to her and then rode the scooter home for her. Later I taught her to shift on a Suzuki Savage.
Initially she was apprehensive, as was I. I didn't leave my quiet neighborhood for weeks after I got my endorsement. She was the same. She was very concerned about leaning the bike in curves which creates problems as motorcycles turn by leaning. She was afraid the tires would slip and she would go down. What we did to alleviate that concern was to put her on the back of my bike and I rode her around leaning more excessively that usual. It was a revelation to her. She had no idea how far a bike could lean.
She now has less fear than me. She is on a Honda Forza 300 scooter. Since she's has it she has scrapped the center stand twice. You really have to lean to do that. Earlier this summer on a tight turn she hit a very small patch of gravel and her rear wheel moved several inches before it caught. Her response was "I wasn't worried because I knew it would just be low-side". Pretty ballsy for a 65 year old lady. I wish she has some of your "fear". She had a VLX 600 for a while and like the bike. I wouldn't have any concerns about it as a starter bike. You'll be fine.
Do you know someone who can get you out on the back and demonstrate the capabilities of the bike? That might be a good strategy, it worked for us.
If you have no fear your going to do something stupid and get yourself killed or hurt. Just my opinion but too much fear holds you back but no fear and no respect kills you.
Taking the MSF beginner course in its entirety should help with some of your fears, but fear is a good thing too as it keeps you sharp and focused. In the MSF, you will learn how to keep your eyes open.
Once you get your motorcycle designation on your driver's license, ride around town in the early mornings or evenings when there is less traffic to get use to things.
Counter-steering and braking are very important and you will learn those in the MSF.
It's the same fear as when you start driving a car, to me. Eventually it's like walking and you give it no thought. As you take steps to get on the big roads and in traffic there is the element of newness that is scary. It's natural and will go away in time. I mean, when you have to run to the store in the car how much thought you give to fear? There is none, I would think.
Not to contradict you because I can't disagree whole hearted . But I have to say I'm a truck driver with 16 years experience and well over a million miles under my belt just in a semi truck, no matter what I drive ( pick up, semi, or bike) I always have just a little concearn for what if, just enough fear to remind me it can go bad real fast. I think if I didn't have that little fear in the back of my mind I wouldn't have the good driving record and the pile of safty awards that I do.
I did this course in May. It's not for beginners but it did wonders for riding, breaking, steering strategies and techniques. Not cheap but worth every penny. I'm much more aware and safer than I was two months ago!
Make it a point to ride every day, if even for 5 minutes. Get your brain used to the feeling. The longer you wait between practice sessions, the less your brain will retain. The second you start to feel a little 'burnt out' in a session, stop. Anything past that will be counter productive. The faster you go, the more stable the bike will be. I'd find a nice long stretch of 45 mph low traffic road and ride it up and down religiously. Low speed maneuvering is one of the most challenging (and important) aspects of motorcycle control. While important to practice, you're not going to improve much with a lack of self esteem. Get used to the 45 mph range to build some confidence. Remember that what your feeling is what most people felt when they first started. My first time on a highway ended up leading me to a detour on a six lane interstate. I enjoyed the initial adrenaline boost, but was completely terrified when a semi passed me for the first time. What your feeling is absolutely normal.
A lot of people say fear is a good thing. It's what keeps you on alive. I would disagree. Fear causes you to make impulsive / irrational decisions and your body gets stiff. The best riders are confident and relaxed. Seems a bit contradictory to endorse fear, then give advice to overcome it. Perhaps caution would be a better word for the mental seat belt.
Don't give up. If Keith Richards can still be alive at age 72, you can learn how to ride a motorcycle.
Hi,
I'm wondering if I'm an odd ball out or if my fear is normal.
I'm 55, a grandma, and new to motorcycles. I had never been on one because my mother was petrified so as I was growing up I never was on one.
I took the MSF course (had to leave the second day for a family emergency) so I am taking it again in the near future.
I have a 1999 Honda VLX600 that I got a great deal from a friend and I absolutely love.
My problem is I seem to have too much fear. I'm not sure if I should hang it up and sell the bike but I REALLY don't want to. I want to ride. Ive watched every video on You TUbe I can find.
I have been riding near my house on a straight service road-no traffic.
I'm nervous about leaning too far or laying it down. I did ok on the Rebel in class and was told when I had to leave that I would do fine when I came back. So they had faith, LOL.
I'm wondering if it's because I'm older and starting? Has anyone else felt like this?
Don't doubt yourself. Your 'concern' should center on the distracted drivers out there. Practice developing situational awareness from a motorcycling perspective, even if you are in the car. And continue to develop that awareness once you get out on two wheels.
So you started at 55 years! you beat me I started at 60 and have now been riding for 3 + years. Still at times I get a little fearful, but maybe that's not bad and keeps me safe. I do give myself some extra rules.
Rule 1: if I'm tired and didn't sleep well: I don't ride
Rule 2: Head ache: don't ride
Rule 3: if I get out riding and find my timing is off (shift timing) I go back home
Rule 4: I don't ride mad at anyone (especially my wife)
These rules cut down on how much I ride, but I feel they keep me safe.
Those are good rules. I won't ride if my coordination is off, if I'm out of sorts, if I'm in a hurry, if I've been drinking or even plan on having one, or if I've had any amount of prescription pain medication. I want all the odds that I can get in my corner!
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